And we’re not talking Santa Y-Fronts here…

wereerOne of my problems, yes one of them, is that I have enormous trouble remembering what I do for a living after a long break. Nearly three weeks in Spain last year, and I was trying to work out whether I’m a plumber, a tap dancer or a brain surgeon. Maybe all three. Anyway, the Christmas break this year had much the same effect. After a lot of jollity, and various people wanting to make sure they didn’t appear stingy with drinks, and tins of shortbread from kind relations, and a complete Stilton cheese from my mother in law that could have won Cheese of the Year (the cheese, not my mother in law) or whatever the cheese equivalent to an Oscar is, and a surfeit of mince pies that don’t do me any good I can tell you – I was ready to get back to the normality of my working day. The premise is simple – I help out with the breakfast and then sneak off up the garden to my haven where I…


Various clues are around. A disk with Speed Drawing Demo written on it in a broad and friendly hand, a pile of mono cartoons which obviously trace the happenings of a conference or team building day of some sort, and a superb bit of kit called a Wacom tablet which is undeniably something to do with arty things. Vague recollections. Ah, cartoons I reckon.

For the first time in about two years I seem to have a bit of time on my hands. I have dreamt of such times, where I would take advantage of this very temporary lull by beginning my life story The Girl Behind The Red Door. But instead I panic – not my normal sort of panic where I don’t know how the hell I’m going to get everything done. No, the sort of panic when I realise I have very little to do so have to face up to the earth shattering realisation that nobody loves me. I’m finished. This cartoonist, who has earned a dubious and occasionally splendid living from his craft, is no more. An empty husk. History.

The phone rings. Aha! Just my imagination! Here goes!

“Barclays. NatWest. Lloyds. Do you…” I tell the recorded voice to go forth and multiply or words to that effect – and return to my high dudgeon.

Ping. An email. ‘Could you do your conference cartoons at our event in…?’ Ping again. ‘These little speed drawing films you make. Could we meet up…?’

Life is smiling upon me again. I’m back at the coal face, talking heartily about what I do – because I’m a cartoonist you know! Yes, I had a wonderful Christmas! Happy new year to you too! Have you ever considered cartoons for the home page of your website too? Copywriting? Of course!

Duncan Cartoons is open for business in 2015! I’m back!

The selling bit: All these wonders can be found on Go on – you know you want to…